30 by 30: Changed Priorities

#13. Read the entire Bible again
#16. Go on vacation alone
#21. Complete the first draft of my novel
#27. Go on a short-term missions trip

As I look over this list of items 25-year old Ila thought 30-year old Ila would have completed, these ones stick out the most to me. These four items have not been completed, and probably won’t ever be, not because my hobbies or priorities changed, but because I changed.

#13. Read the entire Bible again
#27. Go on a short-term missions trip

I’m not sure who knows this, but last Lent season (46 days between Ash Wednesday and Easter) I decided to take a fast from church. Lent is traditionally a Catholic time of reflection. It’s a time where observers will give up something (coffee, alcohol, whatever) or start something (daily prayer or reading) in attempt to relate to the sacrifice Jesus was about to make for the salvation of all mankind. I’m not Catholic, but always really liked the idea of it. Since high school, I’d take that time to give up Diet Coke and think about how much I owe Jesus from saving me from hell.

’d been having a hard time justifying what I know to be true (all people should be treated with dignity and respect, regardless of gender identity, race, sexuality, socioeconomic status, place of origin) and with what the Bible teaches. I’d been looking for something in the Bible that made the god of the Old Testament and the god of the New Testament make sense as the same god, and I just couldn’t find it. So I took the season of Lent to fast from American Christianity.

It was incredibly spiritually and emotionally refreshing, which was all the affirmation I needed that it was the right path for me. The only downside was the friends I lost touch of because I wasn’t seeing them twice a week at church things anymore.

All that to say that I do not intend on reading the entire Bible again, nor do I intend on going on a short-term missions trip. I will, however, continue reading and researching, but probably less about Biblical scholars and more about philanthropic innovators with diverse religious backgrounds. I’m opening to finding balance within the scope of religion in the future, and I don’t know if I can really call myself a Christian anymore. I’ve settled on agnostic for now.

As for the other items on my list:

#21. Complete the first draft of my novel

I’ve just come to accept that I’m not a fiction writer. I got into journalism because I like telling other people’s stories. The writing that I do now is this page and my comedy (more on that later). Maybe one day I’ll come up with a story that I want to share, but I’m done trying to force it and invent something that’s not from someplace natural. I'll leave this one to the actually good writers (like Sarah Wheeler and Amie McCracken).

#16. Go on vacation alone

This is one I couldn’t decide the placement of. I put this on the list because of excellent books like “Tales of a Female Nomad” and “I Promise Not to Suffer” (like Wild, but better) and “My Life on the Road” I think the idea of going on some modern pilgrimage is romantic and scary and adventurous. The independent woman in me says “Hell yes! Let’s go!” and then says “Oh wait…. Uh, there’s no ‘us’ in that?”

I’ve read a lot about thru-hiking. I’ll write more about this when I go into #8 Hike the Wonderland Trail, but I love the idea of being alone in the woods. That said, I’ve never actually hiked by myself. I used to think I would once I had access to a trail-worthy vehicle, but now that I have that, I don’t.

I think I just like being around people too much. My boyfriend travels a lot, and the quiet of our empty condo is awful. I am the kind of person who just wants to be in the room as someone else like, 90% of the time. Now, after reading the previously mentioned books, I have a hunch that the universe provides. But it’s hard for me to put work and money and hard-earned PTO into something I’m not going to share with the people I love so much. Maybe one day I’ll take this alone trip, but I’m not stressing about not completing it before my 30th birthday.

Next post: the “seriously, Ila? Why?!?” items

Ask the Electors

Did you know that you can email electors from 18 states all at once? AskTheElectors.com compiled all the internet contact info they could from the 18 states that legally allow their Electoral College members to vote for someone other than the person their state elected. It also gives you an opportunity to email them all at once. So I did that. And this is what I wrote after reading about two electors trying to change things up. While I disagree that the Electoral College is the way our president should be elected (for a million reasons, most of which I assume you’ve heard about), I think we should use it if we have it. (http://www.politico.com/story/2016/11/electoral-college-effort-stop-trump-231350)

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Dear Elector,

My name is Ila, from Seattle, Washington.

I hope we can all agree that a Trump/Pence White House would be bad for America's most vulnerable populations. Almost no one has fought harder than Pence against abortion rights, despite the fact that abortion and unwanted pregnancy goes down when women have access to it and comprehensive sex education/birth control. Almost no one has fought harder than Pence against LGBTQ rights, rights that people have literally died fighting for. Trump has fought against women, refugees, and the immigrants who have and continue to build this country into the diverse and mostly welcoming place it's become. Trump has only ever looked out for other people named Trump, and I'm a little heartbroken that people really believe this would change just because he isn't a traditional politician.

I'm not asking you to vote for a Clinton/Kaine ticket. I'm also asking you not to vote Trump/Pence. Instead, I'm asking you to join P. Bret Chiafalo (WA) and Micheal Baca (CO) and compromise on a moderate Republican like John Kasich or Mitt Romney. Please give credit to those who have fought and died for the civil progress we've made over these past eight years. Honor those trans people, particularly the trans people of color, who have been killed just for living outside of our expectations a little bit. Honor the men and women killed for being a person of color at a traffic stop or on a street corner. Honor the immigrants who left their homes in search of a living and found themselves on our shores, only to be harassed and disenfranchised by the people they hoped would give them an opportunity.

Your job is to vote for the best interests of the country, even if the country can't do that for themselves. Your job is to protect us from tyranny, and this year that means the religious and economic tyranny of a Trump/Pence White House.

Thank you for your time and consideration, I appreciate and respect the role you serve in our electoral process.

Sincerely,

Ila Dickenson
Seattle, WA
iladickenson.com

Confessions of a Pho Hater

About three years ago, I pitched this idea to Seattle Weekly after they tweeted a call out for food writers. I got a huge amount of pushback on it once it was published online, which kind of proved my main point about how militant this specific set of consumers can be. Since writing and publishing this piece, I have since come around to enjoying pho under specific circumstances (basically when it's that foggy misty cold that Seattle gets or when I have a cold). Most of it still holds true, though.

Before filling my website with the "you just haven't had the right pho" or "how dare you?!?" comments that I know you're tempted by, check out the original article's comments and make sure I haven't yet heard it.

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I have a confession. Brace yourself. Are you ready?

I hate pho. I loathe it. It is the only food I would turn down if it was offered to me free. It is the only time I will tell my friends no when invited out and not already busy. The first time I had it, I was apathetic. Now, three additional attempts later, it is my enemy.

Before I go any further, I should clarify two things.

I really love food. I’ve been known to get giggly or even teary-eyed when I eat something really good. I can name you plates I’ve had that have changed how I look at the world.

Additionally, even if I really hate something I’ve eaten, I will try it on at least two different occasions. After that, I give up and move on to better things.

Very occasionally, I try things I don’t like more than twice. Pho is one of two of those occasions. The only reason I have put myself through this experience of eating this awful dish so many times is because of the reaction I get when I tell people that I don’t like it.

In Seattle, specifically my neighborhood, pho is a cult. I watch people eat it at all hours of the day. Disowning pho is like telling a vegan how much you love KFC. Almost every single time, people need to tell me how wrong I am and how I must try it at their place and add just the right amount of Sriracha and not doing this is why I didn’t like it.

I don’t like it because it’s just bland noodles and sort-of salty broth. Seriously, that’s it. I really think you guys think it’s much more than that. Yes, I realize it usually has meat and some weird veggies in it, but bean sprouts and Thai basil also aren’t that good. Not even lime can save it, and that says something. All four of my experiences have involved eating pho just the way the person who dragged me there told me to eat it, and three of those times have been at highly-rated restaurants and none of that has made a difference.

Pho takes a lot of work to eat. I know a lot of people who swear by pho as a hangover cure, and as the perfect sick food. But this soup is arduous and messy when you’re healthy and hydrated. I can’t imagine trying to put together the magical potion of perfect pieces when you’re distracted by dehydration or the sniffles.

My real dissatisfaction comes from expectations that have been failed to be met. Everyone who tries to convert me swears pho is the best thing ever and that not liking it makes me a hedonistic mutant. Being at least pho-tolerant would make my life so much easier. As it is, this soup has never made me feel anything except frustration and disappointment.

It’s time to face the music, Seattleites. Pho is awful. Can we please stop pretending it isn’t?

They're not coming for your babies

This is something I wrote a few months ago when Washington State was voting on an incredibly discriminatory "bathroom bill" like HB2 passed in North Carolina. While I couldn't imagine that my home and the people in it would actually do something so heinous and decide legally that trans people are inherently dangerous, I couldn't sit back and do nothing. So- at the urging of the amazing crew at Washington Won't Discriminate, I wrote this. I'd like to think I had a *teeny* bit to do with keeping WA safe for trans people.

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Trans people are not perpetrators of crime. They don't sexually assault. They're not trying to trick people. They're not playing dress-up. They're not in a phase. THEY ARE NOT DANGEROUS. They just want a safe place to pee. Not having that causes them to attempt suicide TEN TIMES more frequently than non-LGB people and three-four times more than LGB people. People are literally murdering trans people because of stereotypes and stigmas promoted in this bill, which have zero basis in fact. Bills like this kill people like my sister, who just wants a place to pee and fix her make-up. State sanctioned hate is not okay. Our government should be setting the example of acceptance, not of ignorant hate.